Hott Pants

There are some weird fashion trends out there. Like the whole harem pants thing? Sorry, I am not going to wear something that is referred to as, "parachute pants". Thanks, but I'd rather NOT look like I'm skydiving. Then again, I guess you could say I'm not the most fashion forward girl. That would be my older sister, Kelli. So maybe I'm not one to be judging what's "in" or "out", but while browsing the web the other day, I came across a pair of pants that I'm almost positive no one in their right mind would think about wearing. Maybe I'm wrong. You be the judge.

Ahh, finally! One doesn't have to wear their bikini bottoms underneath their jeans anymore in order to achieve this totally awesome look. SCORE. ;)

Feeling Silly?

If you're like me, you have a sense of humor. And if you have a sense of humor, you will think this is funny. I hope.

Tired of your same ole drive through routine? Here is a list that can help spice things up next time you're purchasing food on the go.

Just imagining someone doing any of the items on this list made for a good laugh. So here is your funny for the day!

And sadly, I cannot take credit for the ingenuity and cleverness that is this list. All credit goes to this site.

20 Things To Do In A Drive Through Lane

1. Stand close to the speaker and yell your order, using colorful expletives in ways which would embarrass the patrons inside.

2. Drive through backwards.

3. Belch your order.

4. After ordering, cover the speaker and mic with transparent tape. Watch as customers and order-takers are unable to hear each other and, thus, each raises his/her volume.

5. Barter. Offer a Whopper for a Big Mac.

6. Walk through.

7. Speak a foreign language (make one up if you have to). When the manager comes to the mic, speak English and inquire as to why the order taker had such difficulty understanding you.

8. Repeat everything the order-taker says.

9. Attempt to take the order-takers order ("Hi, may I take your order?") before they get a chance to take yours.

10. Order confusing items, i.e., "Hi, I'll have a large orange Coke and a small medium fries, please."

11. In a crowded drive-thru line, place a HUGE order, then slip out of line and watch the fun as the person behind you is handed 40 bags of food.

12. When you arrive at the window to pick up your food, hand them several bags of garbage & ask if they'll dispose of it for you. Make sure it smells.

13. Drive through with a carload of naked people.

14. Speak in such a garbled fashion that the order-taker will think there is a problem with the speaker and ask you to order at the window. When you arrive at the window, speak in the same garbled, incomprehensible fashion.

15. Drive through with someone on the hood to accept the food.

16. Bring along a Mr. Microphone. When the order-taker speaks, aim the mic at their speaker but do so while aiming the Mr. Microphone speaker at the mic to produce excruciating feedback of their own voice.

17. One word: Flatulence!

18. Have a friend hide in the trunk. When you approach the window to pickup your order, have him start yelling and banging his fists on the trunk.

19. If you are a male, have a female friend place the order by speaking VERY seductively and suggestively into the speaker. When she finishes, have her hide and pull up to accept your order. See how many of the order-takers fellow employees have been called over to the window to "check out the babe".

20. Change a flat tire in the drive-thru lane.

My New Friends, Ernesto and Big Joe

Okay so funny story...

Yesterday before church I noticed that my car had a flat tire. My immediate thoughts--UGH. I hate, hate, HATE getting flat tires. They just extremely bug me and I feel like I get them a lot. So, at around 5:20 pm I call Triple A and a kind man named Ernesto comes and begins to change my tire to the spare, but wait, he doesn't have the right tools to do so. Triple A doesn't have the right tools to change a TIRE? Uh, okay. Anyway, so he's explaining to me how the rims on my car are "after market" and they need a special type of socket wrench to take them off. I'm like, okay? I have no idea what he is talking about. So Ernesto says,"Oh let me call Big Joe; I'm pretty sure he has the right wrench." So he calls "Big Joe" on his walkie-talkie and they just start chatting and making jokes and Ernesto will pause in between laughs and say to me, "Big Joe is such a kidder, I love this guy!" And I'm like, yeah gotta love Big Joe!! No, I'm really like, can you just change my freaking tire? So it turns out "Big Joe" will not be arriving on the scene for another 15 minutes. So this leaves me to make small talk with Ernesto for 15 minutes. I. Hate. Small talk. Especially with someone you don't know! So I ask Ernesto where the best places are to go get my tire looked at. He tells me, "Oh man, well I don't know because I just go to this place where only Latinos go! Because you know they will just do anything you want to your car no matter how dangerous or stupid it is!" He then proceeds to tell me about all of his souped-up cars (his words, not mine) that he has and how he put these special kind of tires on them so that he can slide around in the snow more. Why the H would someone want to do that? I don't know, it's weird. Finally, Big Joe arrives and yes, he was a rather large man. I'm practically jumping for joy because I just want this stinking spare put on so that I can go inside! Mind you, it is now about 6:45 pm and FREEZING. So Big Joe whips out his tools and bends over to check out the situation. Yeah, I got a pretty nice shot of Big Joe's crack. NICE. Big Joe tries about three different socket wrenches and then says: "Well I'm sorry little missy, but there is nothing we can do for ya. I don't think anyone has that small a wrench to take these puppies off" I'm just like, ARE YOU KIDDING ME?! So they fill up my tire with air and then proceed to pack up all their useless crap and tell me that I have to buy this special socket wrench and an adapter in order to change my tire to the spare. It is now 7:30 pm and of course no place is going to be open at this time, especially on a Sunday, and there is no one around to take me to go buy this thingamabob. So, in the end everything was okay because when I went to check the tire the next morning, it still had air in it so I was able to drive it to Les Schwab. They fixed whatever the problem was and I never had to buy the flipping whatever they were telling me to buy. Anyway, I just found the whole situation very comical and hilarious that Triple A was unable to change a tire. Oh, and whenever I have called them in California to have the spare put on, there was none of this mumbo jumbo about not having the right tools. Whatever, boys!